Ray
I know we'll never speak again.
And maybe this is me writing like a journal.
In all reality only a handful of people know you existed in my life.
And maybe its been for the better, for you.

When I think of you. I find myself full of regret.
Some of the choices I made were influences by family.
Some of the choices were out of fear of complacency.
All of the choices were mine.

Before I met you, I was a *******. I did awful stupid things as an adolescent.

Broke hearts, hurt, and manipulated people because I was played with.
It's no excuse.

It's no excuse for devaluing the people around you,
It's no excuse for taking the easy way out.

There was one thing you reminded me of.
You reminded me of a knight.

You reminded me of honor.
I was once taught the principal by a woman who twisted my brain.

"Honor is doing the right thing when no one is watching."
which is true.
But,
Honor is also being yourself, despite what the world throws at you.

If you find this.
Know that I'm sorry I didn't give you the closure you deserved.