i think i think too much.
i was going through picture earlier,
photos of little me, happy me

and i got to thinking...

i think i was prettier when i was younger
when my hair was long and smooth
my eyes bright and clear
in fact, i felt pretty
i liked my face and body
never skipped a meal or hid behind concealer
i was pretty

and i thought some more...

i think i was smarter then too
my grades were definitely better
i could keep up in class with ease
in fact, i excelled
i was bumped up classes
grouped with the “smart kids”
i was smart

and i thought more...

i was kinder too, so very nice
when it wasn’t so hard to smile and laugh
where id meet new people, clicking instantly
in fact, i had so many friends
i was liked, i was welcomed
grouped with the rest
i was one of a whole

and i thought so much
that i reached the conclusion
that i will never
ever
be as good as i once was
and theres nothing i can do about it
and that all im doing
is falling up the stairs of life
and sinking into the oblivion
of reality