I want to be something
something important
someone important. I want to prove why I’m different,
why I’m here,
why I matter.
I’m so scared.
I don’t want everyone who believed in me,
wasted their time on me,
to be disappointed.
I’m scared of being nothing.
But wouldn’t life be so much better
if I could be something,
something for me or for them.
I don’t know anymore.
I never truly know anything anyway.
People say I’m talented,
that I can make it.
I’m not sure I believe them.
I’m not sure I believe anything.
Why should I?
I’d much rather play pretend,
pretend that I’m something,
that I’m on that stage.
But honestly,
maybe it’s better to be nothing—
makes dying a whole lot easier.