When I looked up at the endless night, Stars twinkled like secrets whispered low, I asked the heavens, “Where’s the light? If God is real, where did you go?” In my heart a storm was brewing, A tempest of love turned bitter and wild, For in those dark moments I felt so alone, With blood on my hands and a heart defiled.
You were my anchor; you were my grace, But addiction wrapped you in chains of despair, Each promise made now lost in the space— Where laughter once danced hangs silence and air. “You said blood is thicker,” but water ran dry, As I clung to memories that splintered like glass; I fought through the shadows with tears in my eyes, Wishing for moments that slipped through time’s grasp.
Oh how I wish I had fought even harder! To keep you beside me when darkness would creep; But strength turned to weakness as hope grew fainter— Each day without you feels buried too deep. You were my home—a refuge from storms, Yet somewhere along our journey we strayed; Now I'm just a doll in your tempestuous arms— A slave to your whims as your spirit decayed.
Every night by the stars I still plead and implore: “Where are you now?” as I wait for a sign; Each heartbeat echoes what once was before— Our laughter entwined like soft tendrils of vine. How can love vanish into shadows so stark? I long for closure but find only pain; What solace exists when light fails to spark? My soul feels tethered by sorrow's cruel chain.
So if God is watching from some distant place, Does He see this struggle that tears me apart? Does He know how it feels to be lost without grace— To miss all the pieces that made up our heart? In starry whispers where dreams fade away, I search for comfort in celestial seas; And though you're gone now—still haunting each day— I’ll hold onto love with trembling pleas.
For though you've chosen those demons above, The bond that we forged can never be torn; And while every moment grows heavy with loss— I’ll find a way forward till new dreams are born. Maybe someday I'll let go of this fight— Perhaps find forgiveness within twilight's embrace; But until then I'll gaze at the stars shining bright— And ask them for solace in this silent space.
Sorry about how long this poem is, I'll try to make it shorter next time!