An Animal Magnetizer went knocking at the doors of farmers and pitched:
Your animals sick, sad and surly? Let me magnetize them and they will be sane, spirited and sweet. Two healings for the price of one!
One farmer thought: Well, it so happens carnival is in town, so let’s take a shot.
The Animal Magnetizer chose one of the goats, closed his eyes, and magnetized……
Dear Goat, you’ve sore knees, you’re too fat.
The goat thought: O, yeah, how about me getting extra fodder because I’m old? And he took a bite out of the magnetizer’s pants.
The Animal Magnetizer went mad and secretly magnetized the goat sore knees for the rest of his life.
The Animal Magnetizer chose one of the chickens, closed his eyes and magnetized…..
Dear Chicken, you’re starving, look at your legs, they are so thin.
The chicken thought: O, yeah, I’m scuttling about all day looking for food and get fed twice a day, I’m just nice and slender.
And it pooped over the Animal Magnetizer’s shoes.
The Animal Magnetizer went mad and secretly magnetized the chicken starvation for the rest of his life.
Well, the farmer said, I’m subwhelmed, you got one more chance.
The Animal Magnetizer chose one of the donkey’s, closed his eyes and magnetized…. (Let’s put a positive note)
Dear Donkey, you’ll have a beautiful child.
The donkey thought: O, yeah, look at my belly, a child can see that. And it peed all over the Animal Magnetizer’s shirt.
The Animal Magnetizer went mad and secretly magnetized the donkey with a child that bore the horns of a goat and the feathers of a chicken.
Ah, well, buster, no cure no pay, the farmer said, I guess my stock relies on it’s own animal magnetism.