Man sits watching an outside film set. The crew takes a break. Man walks over and asks, Who’s the Foley Artist?
Me, says Foley, I invented it.
I’m too silent, man says, can you fit me with some sound?
Sure, what do you want?
Leather soles on wooden floor.
Done.
Man walks over to his girlfriend’s place.
Hey, quit creaking around the house.
Wrong sound, man thinks.
Goes back to Foley.
Can you fit me with another sound? My girlfriend’s freaking out.
Sure, what?
Get me rustling paper.
Done.
Man goes to his office.
Hey, what you shuffling your files for at the lunch break?
You wiping your *** with em too?
Man goes back to Foley.
Colleagues think I’m wasting toilet paper.
Can you fix me another sound?
Well, what will it be?
Try a starting car.
Done.
Man goes to his tennis club. Wins every game.
Hey, you’re like a truck driving over us.
Man goes back to Foley.
Hey, Foley, great sound.
Can’t hear you, cut the engine.