Anger

I’m so angry that words stutter
In my mouth; I’m seething at everything.
Is this what fate has in store for me?
Hunger, brokenness, lifelessness, purposelessness—
Is this my life? I’m consumed with rage.

My anger could varnish cities,
Yet I have no one to blame,
Not God, not the Universe.
Where are you, hidden under rocks,
Deep in oceans, among the stars?
Are you teaching me a lesson?

Universe, I’m bedridden,
Life is slipping by.
My manifestations, my pleas—
Are they unheard?
God, can you hear me?
I need a new path,
This one leads to futility.

Did I fail the race called life?
My road is dark, directionless,
No one in sight.

God, Universe, can you hear me?
I heard that the universe is indifferent,
But I need your help—
It’s cold, dark, and lonely here.

I’m scared, a child in the void.
Is this the end? Poverty, weakness, loneliness?
I look at the fading stars,
My hands searching for a path home.

Is this my fate?
I thought about my tombstone,
What would it say?
“In loving memory of daughter and sister,”
But who will come?
Who will call?
I laughed, is this my fate?

I’m angry because you blessed me
With a restless mind, hopeful yet unfulfilled.
It dreams of oceans, mountains, and fields,
But when I open my eyes, it lies.

God and Universe, this might be my last cry,
I’m fading, a ghost in the dark.
Bring back my color, my spirit.
Is this all that’s left for me?