Please understand.
I am someone who started with a plan and ended
with a mission; I have seen you in your raw beginnings
and I hope I won’t live to the day the sun expands and expands
until it bursts into a million little pieces and takes
you with it.

Treat me
like your lifeboat. It is
not my job to cross-examine your every
move yet the woodpecker
in my heart frantically rattles away
when I am unaware
of the places you seek
to find refuge: a blue hoodie understands you,
acts like armor to defend you. And who am I
to take that away?

I have to take things away, I am
trying to shape you with these hands,
hands accuse you and choose to
make you do things that will at first
feel like whiplash. It is involuntary, a
knee-**** reaction, but I promise you,
I will make sure it all ends okay.

So let me help you.
Closed eyelids cannot read thoughts.
And rejection still stings even if
you expect it. I am not supposed to
understand you, I am out-dated,
like the mix tapes that still speak to me.
I reach out to unblinking faces and
disappearing validation. I leave my
arms in case you fall.  

And aren’t there times when
I’ve tried and tried, and want to
pack my bags and leave it all behind?
Never finish the laundry, put the dishes
aside, stop counting all the hours all the time,
rest these weary hands, and learn how to fly.

But patience
is a virtue, and I’ve had my time.
Now it’s yours. You are ivy, I am
the fence you grow around;
I will bring you closer to the sunlight
and keep your roots in the ground.