You were so high that you could barely walk. I know you missed those yellows so I let them swallow you whole. I carried you from the kitchen to grandma's chair & you slept there. You slept & slept while I kept watch over your heart.

I was always so paranoid someone would steal it. The same kind of paranoid I get when I smoke. You took a piece of me I could have sworn was already missing & showed me it was right under my nose.

Who knows? Maybe after all my time & effort, through good & bad weather I trust you to make things better & you can expect the same from me. I love you so much & I'm so sick of watching myself bleed.

I'm so sick of watching tears fall down your cheeks & knowing it's all because of me. In some sick sort of way when you left me I got stronger & I hated myself for not missing you as much as I thought I would.

Night time made me realize you are the hands I need to guide me out of the darkness & into the light. You are accidental poetry in the form of you being my source of life. Blood, sweat & tears are what will consume our years so I was wondering if you're up for it?