You are like toxin. Just the simplest thought of you can send my body into a figurative halt.

My heart stops.

The constant reminder of how volatile our union was stuck like gum to the fibers my brain.

My perpetual hate reminds how much I love still you. Yet I hate you.

I don’t know if it was your coy nature or the way that you made me feel like I mattered for once in my life.

But you will forever be engraved in my body; my organs will never part with the thought of your touch.
You are still the reason I cry at night and the reason I cannot love more than lust.

You destroyed me. Taking every fiber of my being and rewriting it to fit you and you only.

You don’t want me, yet no one else can have me. It’s like a curse that will never be lifted.

Whenever I looked at you I saw wedding bells and children and a house in the mountains with all the glorious passionate love that you promised me.

Now, I see how stupid I was. How completely crazy insane I must have been to believe that someone as cold as you could ever build something to last.

You flooded my chest with tea and washed out with coffee. Only to leave what had yet to be stained with a red blotch in the shape of your lips on the lining of my heart.

You make me sick. I am ill with the corrupted grunge stain that your love left behind.
I love you, but I ******* hate you. And I cannot even begin to think that I will ever be able to love again.