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Dec 2023
Dear Matthew, I wrote to you, it’s been 23 years.
I heard about Stan back when you were 6…
God, you’re almost 30 now, I pray you’re surrounded by peers.
His death must have hit you hard, like a brick.

It’s Ironic, “all he wanted was a lousy letter or a call.”
I can’t help thinking, did you rip those posters off too?
Or maybe I made him crazy, he was basically writing to a wall.
I hoped it would reach him in time,
Fingers crossed, tight as my hugs with Hailie Jade.
I was sure he’d be doing “just fine.”
But before I sent that letter the thought already started to fade.

Dear Marshall, I’m doing alright, how about you?
I knew you meant the best for my brother,
I really do.
I would have saved his stuff but why bother?
The memories remained, the good ones like buying your new albums.
The bad like a strong scented wine stain.
Regardless of emotion they both ripped me like talons.
Luckily I learnt to take it as a rice grain.

Dear Matthew, I’m good thanks for asking.
You know, its funny reading your brothers letters again but still,
It must have consumed you whole, having to grow up alone - multitasking.
I could feel his joy turn to anger faster than an addict popping a pill.

Dear Slim, it feels weird remembering him.
You remember how he was going to name his daughter that?
My wife’s pregnant too Slim!
I’m thinking of naming him after you, my wife agreed as I gave her belly a gentle pat.

Dear Matthew, I’ll say this again, I’m really flattered you’d call him that.
Does he want an autograph?
Maybe on a starter cap,
Just like you.

Dear Slim, I’m sorry its been a while since I wrote,
I’ve just been busy, I bet you have too.
Anyways, gotta go, I’m almost at the hospital to lower fatherhoods moat.
But it’s the birth of Stans reincarnation, named after you.
- Riaan Parmar
Written by
Riaan
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