we sat in the Field where i first saw You,
the one where i'd converse with You
and dream of when the stars came out.
the one that was in purest form.
(that was after we'd stopped talking)
remember when
i'd started taking a new route because
You'd made me angry that one day that
You had made me say goodbye, and then followed by making it rain
when You know how much thunder and lightning scares me.

so i took a detour down south
and i've come to tell You that demons now linger in my head.
telling me that "bad" isn't always painful, and can be pleasure.
and i sat there wondering where You were to protect me from the words
"come on it'll be fun" or "you know you want to".
and i'd hoped that You'd come find me on the days
that they made me do things i never hoped to do,
but they said it'd make me happy.
it did give pleasure, for awhile.
it seemed to make them happier than it had made me, though.

and i'd hoped to at least receive some sort of postcard from You
telling me that You were sorry and You wanted me to come back,
even though they told me that that only caused pain
as they poured me another drink.

they took me farther south, and i'd felt myself sinking faster than a stone.
even though it was really dark, the stars in the south were too scared to come out.
i too, was scared.
they told me to not be scared but that was an impossible request.
they had then said if i didn't want pleasure that they'd give me pain.
so i pushed away, and i ran from them.

i ran for miles hoping to find the Field or You, but it was too dark.
i needed You and i didn't think You'd hear me
that was until i saw the stars shining again
and i knew You were there waiting for me.
it was bliss.