Why do you hurt me Through what was meant to protect me? Why do you hurt me at all? Why do you want me to tumble and fall? Why do you want to prove me guilty? Why can't you live and let live?
Would it be too hard to accept I take your breaths and you take mine? Would it be too much to ask That you let me breathe? Do you want out of my skin So desperately you'd rather cease Than exist within me?
You were meant to protect me too - You weren't meant to hurt me. You weren't meant to turn my thoughts Into fresh poison every day, And you weren't supposed to want me dead Nor to crave your escape
You were meant to protect me From all the hurt And all the pain And all the suffering You've caused
A misguided attempt at identifying threats That leads to my every atom being misidentified - Why won't you pull the brakes when all has failed? Why am I not good enough for your mercy?
If I'm a threat to myself, how are you not? You have caused more damage in a month Than I ever could hope to in a lifetime. You have destroyed everything I knew of myself and the world - Systems built for years, gone in an instance - Because you decided they should burn
You will die one day, I hope, And peace will rule over my existence then - For death is only ever as scary As the thought of nothing coming after, And I would take an infinity of silence Over another minute under your scrutiny
I hope when I rest where you can't reach me, The world feels my relief and my peace, And whoever comes by my peaceful tomb Feels a relief from their own pain too - I hope when I rest, I rest with such vigor It undoes all the pain you've ever caused
Right in front of my salad?? Written; 2023.apr.4., 2 AM