Apr 2023
Lawrence Hall, HSG
Mhall46184@aol.com
But First There was President Grant’s Speeding Ticket
I’ve never been arrested, but, hey, I’m still young; there’s a chance. Some of the nicest people I know have spent the occasional weekend at the county sheriff’s resort and spa, some opting for longer stays, so I wonder if I’ve been missing something.
If someday I receive a stainless steel invitation to jail I can’t imagine that a private jet and a motorcade will be part of the intake process, or that extra police and the Secret Service will escort me, or that barriers and blocked-off streets will ease my way inside to the receptionist, concierge, complimentary cocktails, a fingerprint manicure, souvenir photographs, and all the other amenities I’ve been reading about with regard to the anticipated indictment of a former president this week.
I don’t recall any stories about law officers or attorneys general sending courtesy notes to wanted men to turn themselves in, pretty please, but then I am behind the times in so many ways. Perhaps soon all arrests will be prefaced by formal courtesies:
5 April 2023
Dear Mr. Percival “Snake Eyes” Thorpe-Ponsonby,
You are cordially invited to a reception hosted by
The Sheriff and the District Attorney
At the County Courthouse on
17 April 2023
2:00 P.M.
Valet Parking
Dress: Afternoon Business Casual
RSVP
In 1872 William H. West, a D.C. city police officer, did not send then-President Ulysses Grant an invitation or a ticket-by-mail; he collared him in the streets of the Capitol for speeding in his one-horse buggy. Officer West, who was a Civil War veteran and black, is reported to have said to the President:
"I cautioned you yesterday, Mr. President, about fast driving, and you said, sir, that it would not occur again…I am very sorry, Mr. President, to have to do it, for you are the chief of the nation, and I am nothing but a policeman, but duty is duty, sir, and I will have to place you under arrest."
-Ulysses S. Grant Was Arrested 151 Years Before Trump's Indictment (businessinsider.com)
The President did not pull the ****** “Don’t you know who I am!?” thing, paid his $20 fine, and was apparently a more careful driver thereafter.
And that, dear readers, is a wonderful remembrance of one of those moments when this nation got things just right.
-30-
Mhall46184@aol.com
But First There was President Grant’s Speeding Ticket
I’ve never been arrested, but, hey, I’m still young; there’s a chance. Some of the nicest people I know have spent the occasional weekend at the county sheriff’s resort and spa, some opting for longer stays, so I wonder if I’ve been missing something.
If someday I receive a stainless steel invitation to jail I can’t imagine that a private jet and a motorcade will be part of the intake process, or that extra police and the Secret Service will escort me, or that barriers and blocked-off streets will ease my way inside to the receptionist, concierge, complimentary cocktails, a fingerprint manicure, souvenir photographs, and all the other amenities I’ve been reading about with regard to the anticipated indictment of a former president this week.
I don’t recall any stories about law officers or attorneys general sending courtesy notes to wanted men to turn themselves in, pretty please, but then I am behind the times in so many ways. Perhaps soon all arrests will be prefaced by formal courtesies:
5 April 2023
Dear Mr. Percival “Snake Eyes” Thorpe-Ponsonby,
You are cordially invited to a reception hosted by
The Sheriff and the District Attorney
At the County Courthouse on
17 April 2023
2:00 P.M.
Valet Parking
Dress: Afternoon Business Casual
RSVP
In 1872 William H. West, a D.C. city police officer, did not send then-President Ulysses Grant an invitation or a ticket-by-mail; he collared him in the streets of the Capitol for speeding in his one-horse buggy. Officer West, who was a Civil War veteran and black, is reported to have said to the President:
"I cautioned you yesterday, Mr. President, about fast driving, and you said, sir, that it would not occur again…I am very sorry, Mr. President, to have to do it, for you are the chief of the nation, and I am nothing but a policeman, but duty is duty, sir, and I will have to place you under arrest."
-Ulysses S. Grant Was Arrested 151 Years Before Trump's Indictment (businessinsider.com)
The President did not pull the ****** “Don’t you know who I am!?” thing, paid his $20 fine, and was apparently a more careful driver thereafter.
And that, dear readers, is a wonderful remembrance of one of those moments when this nation got things just right.
-30-
