I'm actually not doing okay right now.
I haven't ate in days -
just the thought of food makes me feel sick,
it honestly disgusts me.
I don't really know what to do.
I can't seem to go a day without these thoughts in my mind -
self-harm
self-hate
I enjoy seeing myself hurt.
I daydream about these types of things -
the razor blades slashing at my ankles
the sizzling, scorched skin under my fingertips
It is so hard to fight these urges, these desires.
I am so angry with myself.
I cannot stand the thought of who I am.
I cannot even look in the mirror
without crying and screaming.
I truly believe these thoughts that roam around my head  -
"you're worthless"
"you deserve to die"
"**** yourself"
"you'll never be good enough"
"no one loves you"
"just give up"
"why are you still here"
I don't recognize myself anymore.
I just don't know what to do anymore.
Who am I?
What is wrong with me?
Please, I just need someone to hear me,
someone to help me.
I cannot conquer these demons alone.
I cannot keep living like this
and why should I?