I take out my organs hurriedly, like I can't get them out quick enough
spread them out sloppily before you, a grotesque pile of flesh to be admired
You shake your head, disapproval
It's not enough
so I reach into myself further, grasping whatever loose veins I can find
praying that weak muscles will give, snapping bones to frame the masterpiece
to confine it to your field of vision
You shake your head, disapproval
It's not enough
so I wring out my limbs as you breathe out cold smoke into my throat
I choke, and you love the sound
creating a melody out of haggard breaths as you strangle my warmth
you stayed up all night composing new rhythms out of twenty six letters
and wrote them on your palms to wrap around me later
and it's never enough
I'm your vision of hell, an apocalypse
I'm the night you couldn't find your way home and slowly drowned in the rain
I'm the hole in the ground you won't see before you fall to your knees
and spill the contents of your skull along the pavement
I'm the car crash that you dream of getting into some days
and you can make it go away, exorcise your demons
the answer in the end of me
dying to make you happy
I'm dying to make you happy
pouring cement and gasoline down my throat, into a mould
hollowing myself out
to become a carcass on the roadside
to bleed out into the earth