eyes flutter open, the room is darkened reflecting the absence of light outside.
the realization of who I've become dawns on me.
I am ashamed.
afraid.
but I close my eyes again, "i love You, Lord."
I say the words in my heart hoping You know it's true even though You haven't been seeing it.
and when I open my eyes again, light begins to shine.
the sun rising in the sky and in my heart.
and yet, there is still hope.
despite how far I've gone and how long I've stayed in the darkness.
there is still hope for redemption in a sinner like me.