The cardiologist said it was a heart attack.
So for the past three weeks since this episode,  I have gone into the outer limits of my existence.
Often pondering my mortality. I find myself lost in thought at the most inconvenient times.
What would not-being-alive be like?
My heart would quit beating. No blood flowing to my body.
One by one organs and tissue would die. My brain would stop receiving signals
from my eyes, my ears, my touch.
With no brain activity, would I still have thought?
If so, what would I think about if I was no longer receiving information from my senses?
But one day - all this will happen, sooner or later.
I am choosing the later regardless.