i walk beside him
but i wish it was you

i want to streach out my hand
reach for you
but it's your hand i want
not his

he plays taylor swift
as we drive
but all the songs
only remind me of you

once sweet
now bittersweet
hoping everything
every moment with me
is not bitter to you

in every movie

in every sunset

in every sad love song

in every drive home

in every warm & rainy may sunday evening

every snowflake

every amber fallen leaf

i crave that glimpse of us
your baby blue gingerly meeting mine
and your warm fingers interlaced with mine
as we walked to our picnic bench

the things i avoid
are the only things i have
to catch that glimpse of us

tell me it's not
the only thing that i'll ever have
that's closest to having you

tell me there'll be a day
when you'll love me
the way i love you
only harder than we ever have

the tears i dry
seconds before i walk into work

you said forever
and start with forever
you said you'd propose . . .
one day we'd be one . . .

if this isn't over
why do i still cry when i write

hesitantly indulging
in your favorite songs
just for my fix of us

skyline deep violets
bright golds
vibrant oranges
flush pinks

stars peeking
lights igniting
the evening life

sitting at our picnic bench
knowing you're not here with me
holding back tears.
"i'm with you" vance joy.
people drive by
as i long for any of them to be you . . .
just come sit with me . . .
be with me . . .
be next to me . . .
darling, i used to be


awaiting the day
this could be real,
just like you longed,
just like i dreamed,
just like we hoped

awaiting the day
i no longer need
this glimpse of us
to feel the warmth of us . . .