this wave of sadness hit me now,
no-where seemes a happy place to be now
it hurts to breathe,
it hurts to listen,
it hurts to speak,
it hurts...
it just hurts to exist
its not an even experience
it neither is overwhelming
i feel all these emotions bubbling
but nothing seems to leave me
no drab
no tear
no grab
no fear
i'm free and lonely
i'm free and hurt
i'm free and non-existent
i'm happy to be free and
unhappy when i'm here
i'm free and many things,
many things but happy.