"they won't know what you did last night!"
there are hurried steps they hear upstairs
but the date night can't wait.
It's already waited 35 years to happen
and now that he's started to go to bed early
lock himself up in his room
and isolate from his friends at school,
they can finally get some alone time
and enjoy their passion fruit.

"the time you spend away is just a joy to this world!"
it made sense to him that no one came to the rescue
and that his parents celebrated his demise.
Just in time for him to pick the position for them to find him
while he's dead and long gone
far away from the responsibility of
saying goodbye to those who will never stop missing him
but
"they will finally love you when  you're gone!"
was all he could hear
from the chanting harmonies to
hell.








eyes locked to only light in the room like a moth
he believes that he has pain like a damage brain
but his mouth still waters at the thought of happiness,
enough to make him live every single
day.


-stop pretending like life is one step away from suicide
because you diminish the pain of those who are
and pretending that you have pain will only get you so far
and your misjudgment will lead others farther into the dark-







the moonlight is out and I just can't think
about anything else than the fact that I
don't understand-
i never know why i feel like i'm sad,
when i feel so nostalgic that it burns it's own path
through the forest of thought that surrounds my mind
and i wish i could come out into the light
but i know there's a reason to explore every inch of this
darkness that lingers inside of me drifting-
i just want to say that everyday is worth living
and even these dark parts of the world are worth exploring
there is joy in the eyes of those who starve to death
there is joy in the eyes of those who know nothing
there is joy in the eyes of many who have suffered
and there is joy to be found in the eyes of those who are suffering.
there is new glory
there is new fountains of sparkling welfare to be found and fountained into our throats and to come splashing out and onto others-
there is much to ***** about
(in a good way)
there is much to be found
and much to be lost
and not enough time to keep trying to write something sentimental
when you have nothing to say.