I am so lonely.

Every day the weight of it crushes me knowing how isolated I am from you from me from the world I exist and breathe I feel the weight of it crushing me.

I am so alone I make plans to be alone in a two story apartment with no people or animals around me just me just me the only breathing thing in the room is me the only thing alive in that apartment is me even so I wonder when you are alone if you ever feel alive living life as it is or if death already has greeted me through the darkness of lights I refuse to turn on because I know no one will be sitting in that space beside me.

I am so lonely no one has ever saw me for me they peer into my soul for a glimpse of everything that is beside me behind me over me what they choose to see is not me why can’t they see me as I am I that hard to decipher am I invisible I am trying to let them see me but they walk right past the empty space I thought I stood within I’m trying to tell them this is me but the words refuse to come together I stand in silence in the middle of the room as usual no one noticing as usual no one knows me no one cares that I exist the people who care are the ones who can’t even reach me.

I float outside my head and circle the space around me, I am lonely as it always is just me my plans surround only me and the things I want to see and feel and live on my own with just only me it echoes a sound of serenity bubbling the space around me no one can see me and no one can touch me the only person who can hurt me is me.