my first heartbreak wasn’t a beautiful boy with danger in his eyes and temptation in his smile

the first person to make me doubt my worth wasn’t the impossible girl who ignored me all day and explored my body all night

my first heartbreak was 6 year old me
screaming in the darkest corner under my bed, begging you not to leave me,
finally crawling out to embrace you one last time
in the hopes i would be enough to make you stay

i watched my innocence and any shred of self i’d developed walk out the door with you
my first heartbreak was a man who chose to be my father, choosing to leave