dear friend i'm sorry i'm sending another letter so soon but i deeply need your help it all happened last night i know you couldn't come so i'll tell you what happened the party was over but i didn't want to go home home is where my bed is and my bed is where my thoughts bloom so i sat outside on the stairs fifth step from the top i know because i counted i just sat there with my head planted firmly on my knees not making a single sound and i wanted him to ask if i was okay which is weird because i never want people to do that he never asked anyway he never even looked at me instead he stood on the field directly across from the stairs hugged his friend and kissed her on the cheek touching a bit of her lip with his then he was gone and i didn't see how he left or in what direction he went but he was gone and he didn't care that i was left alone again and i know i left him too and i know he doesn't want to hear me apologies or explain why i acted like i did that's why i'm writing this letter because i know he listens to you and i need you to tell him that i am deeply sorry and i hate myself for ever letting him go