I broke free on a Saturday morning I put the pedal to the floor Headed north on Mills avenue And listened to the engine roar
My broken house behind me and good things ahead A girl named Cathy wants a little of my time Six cylinders underneath the hood crashing and kicking Aha, listen to the engine whine
I am going to make it through this year If it kills me I am going to make it through this year If it kills me
I played video games in a drunken haze I was seventeen years young Hurt my knuckles punching the machines The taste of scotch rich on my tongue
And then Cathy showed up and we hung out Trading swigs from a bottle all bitter and clean Locking eyes, holding hands Twin high maintenance machines
I am going to make it through this year If it kills me I am going to make it through this year If it kills me
I drove home in the California dusk I could feel the alcohol inside of me hum Pictured the look on my stepfather's face Ready for the bad things to come I down shifted as I pulled into the driveway The motor screaming out stuck in second gear The scene ends badly as you might imagine In a cavalcade of anger and fear
There will be feasting and dancing In Jerusalem next year
I am going to make it through this year If it kills me I am going to make it through this year If it kills me
This is a song about how sometimes you are living in a house and you're in high school and your stepfather is abusing your mother and you, and it really *****. You have to take a lot of drugs to deal with that, right, but you don't have to, I should say. But you probably do. And when you do, they make you feel marginally better but the main thing that makes you feel better is the company of other people who are as damaged as you are or will shortly become as damaged as you are, and you can sense it, because there is an internal sensor if you bear some damage, you have this sensor that says 'That person is either damaged or is getting there, and I think I will hang out with her until things get a little brighter.'