Is it possible to grieve someone you never met? I smiled for months feeling you two inside me Thinking this was as good as life could get.
Five months later, the surgeon told us you no longer had a heartbeat. Following the animalistic sobs, I realized that we'd never get a chance to really meet.
I carried your corpse inside me until your sister could grow a little more. The guilt and anger i hold inside me Makes my heart and soul feel completely torn.
A few weeks later, they handed you to me all bundled up in a blanket. I held you for an hour before they took you away. The silent tears ran down my cheeks and all i did was pray.
Your twin sister, Christine, is doing well. Sometimes when i look at her, i think of you and cry. It kills me to know you what you would have looked like, and I'm sure you would have given your daddy hell.
I love and miss you, my sweet Catherine. Lord knows i struggle with faith, but i dream about meeting you in Heaven one day and i can't wait to hold you in my motherly arms again.
It's been a while.... but clearly i write when I'm hurting.