You use your one phone call a month
to dial my number.
Let me know that I'm worthless,
a disgrace to human kind.
I barely listen,
your insults no longer affecting me.
I'm not the one behind bars.
But this time I can't shake the words;
the obscenities haunting me.
Why am I the disgusting one,
When you're the one who's ****** up?
When all I did was fight back
trying to get you to stop?
You did more damage in eight months,
than I could do in my lifetime.
I still get the flashbacks and nightmares.
You get to sit back and smile,
knowing I'm the girl you destroyed
While I'm busy fighting the mirror,
screaming at the reflection I see there.
My thoughts are broken by your voice,
insults and abuse replacing confidence.
Five years and I still can't fix myself.