I just wish that my heart wasn't a star Still shining bright to those that see it But dead millions of years ago Something to be wisheded upon In the careless, childish folly of daily life
Such as making wishes Pointless beacons of unrequited hope That drives us as souls to the brink of sanity And for some, such as the wanderer that I am It drives us over that invisible boundary And banishes us to an unfathomable pit
This pit, generalized as depression, insanity Is seen with similarity amongst pits Yet no pit is equal to another Each is unique, special to and hated by its owner Yet it is seemingly inescapable And thus loved from necessity
And those who pass us by want to help Offer a hand to pull us from the pit But every outreached hand reaches a little deeper And the abyss of life likewise deepens Until you have no choice but to fill it
And filling such a whole is no simple task First a pail of confidence is added And then several more of momentum As the hole begins to fill a hunger to heal forms Where you overemphasize the process And forget the reason
Thus the devilish being opens its jaws And swallows every pail you have placed upon it And mistakes your action for hope And once more deepens exponentially
So here I lay, contemplating the treachery That my life has slowly devolved into And I have to question to myself Do the stars in the sky hang so low Because they feel the death of their brother inside me?
This is sort of how I feel in the present but I do not understand the truth or the completion of this expression. I have shut any prior feelings off, yet emotions remain. I do not understand myself, yet I know me completely. I have nowhere left to turn but a blank page and an aquarium of thoughts swimming without reason in my head. Please excuse the lack of any artistic style in the piece. I am very tired and very alone