you know that feeling where you don't want to get out of bed you don't want to open up your blinds and see the world pour in through the sun's rays because you know deep down it wouldn't make you happy anyway you have nothing to look forward to nothing to smile for
that is how i feel every day these days and i wonder when it will go away
everywhere i turn i am disgusted my life seems to but nothing more than a collection of disappointment and lies soon enough it will drive me off the edge and i know i will go crazy there-is-no-turning-back crazy just like esther in the bell jar that's what i think that's why i sympathize and empathize with her she is just like me a person muffled and choked by customs and expectations