i whimper and struggle underneath the weight
of a full-scale massacre
won’t my world ever be the same?
won’t my consciousness refuse to wake in the face of such…
tragedy?
cross-hatch the heavens
seal shut the gate as he looks out upon me, out past the closing door
his eyelid like a tiny boat.
it is with a ballad in its might
that i both see and feel this
goodbye,
to my others, it bolsters itself to the light of the sun
and the grief that tears through me
is another entity.
it has outweighed the sound of nails against board
it has outweighed illness, and the tiresome conversation of hope
it has outweighed many days lost at sea
outweighed the great loss of a person
outweighed the equal and greater gain of another
outweighed the potential of life
it has outweighed its shortcomings
every-thing,
as it is,
has been diminished as an ember.
yet the fire rages on,
embellished and doted and needed
labored upon.
and i, i do not dream of labor.