All of the plans I had written in my head for myself are now no longer options.

Big beautiful blueprints, but I no longer have any of the right materials to build. The materials I do have left... I have no idea what to build with.

I am in limbo.

Every morning while I brush my teeth it feels like I spend an eternity trying to sketch out in my head:
1. who I am
2. who I want to be
and
3. where I'm going.

But most nights, when I crawl in bed and stare out the window I find myself scratching at it all with a big pink rubber eraser;

"This is all I am, this is all there is".

These plans never even last a day.