I hope everyone's expectations of me,
Are thrown right back in their face.
I hope I never find someone to love,
And everyone learns to fear me.
Cause I'm fear-ridden myself,
So why should I deserve love?
There's this bomb fragment,
Left overs in my stomach,
From the last time that I nearly died,
And the feeling that overcame me,
I don't want to feel again,
But I truly believe I will.
I better be dead before I'm fifty,
So I don't have to see the end,
I better see God and flip him off,
Then go on to haunt my loved ones,
Cause then they'll think I care,
When really I just want to scare them.
The rust spreads every day,
I'm dying at just the thought,
That maybe I'll spend my money,
On something completely useless,
Or maybe I'll drive into a ditch,
While completely blackout drunk,
Maybe then I'll regain my senses,
And find company with someone's gods.
I'm not going back to the time,
When I slept over at Motel 6,
I won't dare to dream of riches,
Cause then I'll lose my humanity,
I'm not going back to the time,
Where I passed out on the family couch,
Thinking that was the last time,
I'd ever see my mom's face,
I'm not going back to the time,
Where my step-daddy hit me,
Over and over again,
I can't stop this endless churning,
Of grief and mindless decay,
So pray that I make it,
Another painful day.