you love him
and
i love you.
i ****** him.
i really did
and
i couldnt decide whether i was
trapped in a hell of sleep
or the reality of love lost
of love destroyed
of no love at all.

oh
is all i could manage under the sun
under the pressure
under the god ****** influence.

i love him though
each syllable a knife
a dagger
a horror
and
he loves me

i cried myself to sleep with
a bottle of pills as my
teddy
and
***** as my *baba