(aka been there, done that)

lost between immensity and eternity,
                     caught between lieutenants♥ who both love me.
   & what’s more, i’ll never be able to choose:
             they can’t convince me of their truth.
“why can’t they understand i’m stuck?”
                    “why can’t i remove myself from this rut?”
        —they offered me head of their revolution!
            promised me black roads & nibiru cataclysms—    ...

    ...do i want both?

                you won’t ever feel how it’s like to live a life like me
    you don’t know what life is like when you’re like me
                     they’ll never find a cure for those who are like me
they’ll never understand what life is like for me

                   i’ve tried not to show i’m pussyfooting around this:
                             i’ve tried so hard to hide all my knickknacking
              because the eyes of a trailboss♥ can mistake
                                 your innocence with guilt and blame
                            yeah, i’m caught between two lieutenants
                                          with who i share a mutual stint,
                            either i digest one & ***** the other:
                  or wish i didn’t have anyone to call “sir”♥     ...

...to begin with.