My room has no windows anymore.
It stresses me out to see the cars parked in front of them.
So now there are no windows, no sunlight.
It stresses me out having no windows.
So I go out for walks.
Can't keep walking, must rest cause I feel bad though the walks are nice.

Resting at my room again that has no windows.
Drinking hot tea way too fast.
Eating too much, unable to dance.
Body aching and feeling heavy, my head as well, my heart as well.
Waiting for better days.
Trying to find ways to walk towards and to walk through better days.
Telling myself it's ok.
It's ok to have no windows.

I've not been getting along with my body.
It felt used up so I let it be used to find a way out.
But I didn't find a way out.
Instead I dreamed I got pregnant with a boy.
But it was wrong because of the way it happened.
So my body started to bleed and reclaim its strength, be one with me.
Be one with nature and the wind like I've always been.

Waiting with these walls around me.
Maybe it will work out, maybe not.
In this room together with my body.
We're in this together.
Again for a while.
Even though it aches.
Waiting till these walls again might break.

The windows will fly open.
And I will fly away.
Hopefully I'll see somebody that I love and he won't break my heart.
He's a bit of a rough man, rough on the edges, rough at some parts.
But we got such a connection.
I'm also far from alright, never walk towards the light but straight into the dark.

I told him: I can see in the dark.
But sometimes I wished I was blind.
And he dreamed about it.
He dreamed about me having these black eye contact lenses.
They gave me a super power to deal with the pain and suffering.
I just deal with it already but it would be nice.
Having a super power.
It would help.

Now I got this windowless room.
And this body that actually doesn't want me to keep writing.
My head is spinning.
Muscles tightening.
So I keep waiting and surviving to see the next good thing come around.
And to see my rough man.
Through the darkness, the aching, the ringing in my ears.
Soon we can both run towards the sea maybe.
Sea sight, Syonight.