Brown hair, green eyes and a mole on my thigh
Five feet four inches but used to be five.
Don't mention my weight its a problem with me
Because I like to eat biscuits with my cup of tea
Wrong side of fifty by ten years or more
I don't bother to lie about age anymore
Children all flown now, with kids of their own
Still like to call me and moan on the phone
I live on an island in the beautiful Med
(Kids say I abandoned them, left them for dead)
I'm quite easy-going but I'm not a doormat
I love to sit down over coffee and chat
Friends say I'm funny, sarcastic and rude
I'm partial to swearing but nothing too crude
So that's me in a nutshell, I hope you now see
The person behind this amazing poetry!