As the teardrops fall from my eyes, I contemplate on my life. I've never been good at anything But I fooled myself into thinking That I was loved by you. I wish The first words that popped into my head I wish that we never met I wish that I didn't love you I wish that I too was like My brothers after me Gone Without a trace left Except for the occasional pain and heartache. My mother's strong So I'm sure losing another won't be too hard A blow. My head, a dark place and you, the light within The light flickers and then finally withers You're gone. My anxiety grows worse Depression creeps in Sleep no longer offers any comfort Skimpy meals and music embrace me Like a mother, placing my head On her *******, caressing it slowly Until I fall asleep. A forbidden slumber As my consciousness slips away, I say a final prayer to protect my mother.