i am not these words
nor these actions or hearts
leave me be, puppeteer
let me craft my final start

i'm trying, i am
to free of this heaviness
but with every day passing
i become myself a little less

i have feared for too long
a cloud lifting me so high
for a darker storm awaits
vengeful, with a laugh so wry

tonight, i lay drenched
embracing an old, ****** clutch
the anticipation since farewells
for friendships that cruel can't bare to grow rust