As I grow   or whatever grown-ups call it
I begin to realize how broken    I was    how even
now, I still am      and how    I choose to
hurt you sometimes    because  I don’t want to
face   my fears   last time we got
drunk, I cried  uncontrollably   begging you to provide
answers to the greatest   questions of all      
like    what is this   the love I have for my parents     my dead dog
where did he go     nothing is forever     so what is it
that ties   you and I together     what is it
what is it?
How many times have you held me   close   wishing
I’d answer   my own   enigmas

and still, you call me back
and still, you hold
and still, you care

how you do it exactly, I don’t know