Feb 2021
I would do anything to lift the gloom
Then maybe you could find the strength to leave your room
To see everything that’s worthwhile
From the admiration of your closest friends
To the mischievous smile of your only child
I’d honestly much rather go blind than watch you carry on in so much pain
With merciless intensity it deserves it’s only special name
Afterall, you once craved being the centre of attention
Back when you had unbounded energy and so much love to give
But now you appear to be scared of your own shadow
Let alone think of any positives to fight your way through and live
Maybe if you could stop and take a breath
Then you wouldn’t get so upset?
However the look on your face suggest I should mind my own business
But it’s so hard to keep my nose out as a decade long witness
To the manic way you like to operate
So come on, what happened?
Now you’re the kind of person who takes breaks from watching Netflix on your tablet
Only to replace it by sticking your face up against your laptop
Not due to any pressing engagements
But because you’re afraid of spending time alone with your thoughts
You say they’re too intelligent for you
In that self-deprecating style you’ve become accustomed to
Confessing they always find a way to twist and turn your conscious into knots
I suppose that explains your new found addiction to psilocybin
It’s plain cruel
Just how much fun your mind has playing tricks on you
All for the sadistic joy of seeing you cry as you succumb to the unrelenting pressure of grief
I’m actually surprised it still allows you to recognise me
If only for a fleeting moment before you’re overcome with uncertainty
That’s the moment where I can’t help but fall to bits
Realising we’re far removed from those halcyon days where we’d only reminisce
I know it’s hard
Especially when your inner monologue starts to dishearten
But I need you to do me a favour and try to take your medicine
Because I think it’s your last shot of achieving some much needed pain relief
Although, it’s clear you remain unpersuaded
You’re not even trying to hide it
The rings that surround your eyes have inconceivably darkened
And the stare you’re given me is nothing short of terrifying
Like you’re getting lost in another one of your frequent hallucinations
Where the spirit inside transcends into another outer body experience
All in a mish mash of broken contradictions
So it’s no wonder you come across heavily jaded
Ever since you became overwhelmed by the crippling sense of vacuity
But just like the task at hand you feel totally incapable of passing life’s grand test
That’s why you feel the need to self-sabotage on purpose
Something you’re quite good actually
So good, I’d call you the queen of casuistry
I just need you to know I’m not here acting from a position that’s self-seeking
I would do it all for you, I would do anything
Then maybe you could find the strength to leave your room
To see everything that’s worthwhile
From the admiration of your closest friends
To the mischievous smile of your only child
I’d honestly much rather go blind than watch you carry on in so much pain
With merciless intensity it deserves it’s only special name
Afterall, you once craved being the centre of attention
Back when you had unbounded energy and so much love to give
But now you appear to be scared of your own shadow
Let alone think of any positives to fight your way through and live
Maybe if you could stop and take a breath
Then you wouldn’t get so upset?
However the look on your face suggest I should mind my own business
But it’s so hard to keep my nose out as a decade long witness
To the manic way you like to operate
So come on, what happened?
Now you’re the kind of person who takes breaks from watching Netflix on your tablet
Only to replace it by sticking your face up against your laptop
Not due to any pressing engagements
But because you’re afraid of spending time alone with your thoughts
You say they’re too intelligent for you
In that self-deprecating style you’ve become accustomed to
Confessing they always find a way to twist and turn your conscious into knots
I suppose that explains your new found addiction to psilocybin
It’s plain cruel
Just how much fun your mind has playing tricks on you
All for the sadistic joy of seeing you cry as you succumb to the unrelenting pressure of grief
I’m actually surprised it still allows you to recognise me
If only for a fleeting moment before you’re overcome with uncertainty
That’s the moment where I can’t help but fall to bits
Realising we’re far removed from those halcyon days where we’d only reminisce
I know it’s hard
Especially when your inner monologue starts to dishearten
But I need you to do me a favour and try to take your medicine
Because I think it’s your last shot of achieving some much needed pain relief
Although, it’s clear you remain unpersuaded
You’re not even trying to hide it
The rings that surround your eyes have inconceivably darkened
And the stare you’re given me is nothing short of terrifying
Like you’re getting lost in another one of your frequent hallucinations
Where the spirit inside transcends into another outer body experience
All in a mish mash of broken contradictions
So it’s no wonder you come across heavily jaded
Ever since you became overwhelmed by the crippling sense of vacuity
But just like the task at hand you feel totally incapable of passing life’s grand test
That’s why you feel the need to self-sabotage on purpose
Something you’re quite good actually
So good, I’d call you the queen of casuistry
I just need you to know I’m not here acting from a position that’s self-seeking
I would do it all for you, I would do anything
