Because I thought of you,
Without even thinking.

And I thought about what you would say,
Without even saying it.

You don’t need words.

And I thought about how you would help me,
Because God knows I needed it.

And if you were here, you would see me falling into a hole of despair.
You would see it straight through my smiling and my laughter.

You would help me like no other because you would sit down with me at the creaky, old table in that rustic coffee shop and ask me how I was doing and after I responded with the most generic and insincere response you wouldn’t give up you would keep going and you would eventually get to the bottom of it and you would start slow and realize that things like this take time and you would first start out by going to the counter and interacting with the barista who knew my name and you would order a blueberry muffin and also treat me to mango boba, hold the whip cream, and you would get yourself a scone and you would come back and we would eat it together and you would notice how that little bit of food made me feel better and how my mind was tricking my body and how I now started to talk to you without you forcing me to and how you really did get to the bottom of it and how I admire your persistence and genuine acts of kindness that keep my toes grounded on a day-to-day basis and

And, and, and—

And now I’m sulking in a puddle created by my own tears,
Because you’re not here.

And I’m thinking of you,
And I know you’re not.