I guess I'm so tired
Of trying so hard
& never accomplishing anything
I guess I'm just exhausted
It takes too much energy to love everyone
& try to be there for them
& I wish I knew what do do
(for once)
I wish I wasn't such a mess
I wish I had everything figured out
But who am I kidding
Wishes don't come true
Especially not mine
Why would they?
I don't deserve it
I don't deserve any of it
What have I done,
To be worth something?
(nothing)
I am nothing
I give nothing
I just take
and take
and take
& destroy every good thing in my life
& self destruct.
Every night.