my stomach turns,
as the waves below me crash in swirling spirals.
my hands shake,
as the blue and red capsules turn their devilish eyes onto me.
my heart wheeps,
as the cool silver screws lay on the floor.
my lungs scream,
as the tie lays, unused for the formal dinner you promised.
my feet dance,
as the edge calls closer.
my body longs for it, though my heart tells me no.
and my head tells me yes.
yet, the only thing stopping me are three simple words.



does it hurt.