I’ve never had such a struggle for words,
As I’ve had since I chose to speak out.
The silence has become almost my prison
Forced upon me, until I no longer know
What it is like to speak at all.

Sitting alone I have no idea where to start,
So repeatedly and regrettably I do the only thing that I know.
Allowing once again for the silence to embrace me.
To draw me in to a place where
Words mean pain, fear, and memories.

Thoughts that I no longer wish to remember.
I realize that I’ve remembered all that I know,
Without exception.
I’ve come to accept my silent defense,
Unwilling to feel the pain of anything.
But one question still remains:

Where do I go from here?

-Marie
02/08/2007