I told him I've never enjoyed sex before him
parts of that are true
but parts still remind me of cum in my hair
and dirty pictures
and feeling his smile inside me at 14.
The taste of his mouth eludes me
I remember it was sweet.
Everything was sweet then.
but parts still remind me
Of a blowjob after that wedding
of me sneaking to the bathroom afterwards
Pressing my face against the cold tiles.
That is where I cried at 16.