Losing control
******* in sin
in amber shot glasses, beer glasses,
goblets red like blood and twinkling in the fire

I try not to mind it
I love him and he just turned twenty one
the age of no more
I try, I promise I do

But I watch a woman drink herself to death
Every
Single
Night
And it occurs to me that I cannot see
the difference
between out of control and completely sober

It has gotten to the point where I see horrible fires at beer commercials, lighting them all up, eating away their sin in explosive technicolor
And I want to hurt the woman in the Spirits Store
even if she has done nothing wrong
but sell my mother the evil
No, it's not actually evil,
but still, I want to choke the life out of her body and keep squeezing
until I feel vertebrae pop
red grapes in my hands
will you partake of that wine?
The pleasure is still there, a kick of adrenaline.
Will you partake?
My sin, though worse than yours, is still sin
Waste not, my friends
**** it in like rats
and I will fall upon you like an avenging angel, reaping

But then I realize
that's crazy.
That's unreasonable.
I should just go to bed.