do the dead envy the living?
by @butterfliesonmytongue
do you think the dead envy the living
do you think they lust over the chaotic fury of youth
cause right now i am lost
twenty-one and young
drinking and crying
through snapchat filters
and "emerald exhales"
through the books on my ikea shelf
which highlight the glorious escapades
of some protagonist I can't relate to
do you think the dead envy me
as my heart breaks at the thought of a boy
who never even knew my name
when I get parking tickets or
cut my knee on gravel outside my apartment
and lie to my family saying no- I was sober.
do the dead envy the living
at their most irresponsible
their most reckless
and their most messy
am I still coveted and loved at my worst
for the simple fact That I Am Alive?