Every once in a while I return to my thoughts here,
I re-read them, re-say them, re-feel them.
I revisit the darkest moments and I relive the pain.
It hurts me to recall the excruciating pain I was in....the pain I was in over a boy.
It hurts me to remember lying in my room night after night, clenching my chest to see if I was still breathing.
It hurts me to know how much I gave of myself, how much I lost of myself, and how much pain I allowed myself to be in, over someone who did not love me the way I deserved.

But I needed to learn, and I did.
I needed to feel pain, to know proper love, and I did.
I needed to see your flaws to stop loving you, and I did.
I needed to get out, and I did.
I needed to see I deserved more,

and I do.