anxiety,
wondering which pair to wear,
blue, it was blue
she says a prayer for courage and comfort
no pockets, just slip it into the boots,
it's there

nervously sitting,
so young and unsure of herself
he comes out, "it's your turn",
he says with his kind voice and smile
she stands hesitantly,
she follows to the room.

questions, answers to those questions
can't think straight, mind racing
"any questions or concerns?"
"actually, yes." so unlike her.
she pulls it out of the blue boot,
tears begin to form in her eyes, she explains.

the door closes, she's out
but the feeling of relief never comes
instead, she's left with feelings of abandonment,
from who? God?
can't see past the mist, promises left unfulfilled?
trudging away in her blue boots.

17 months pass,
same place, same man, same blue boots,
but there's a difference in the girl.
more worn, just like her boots,
but more kind, more understanding, more sure.
molded by the God she knows and loves.

looking back on the gray,
she starts to see color, and not just blue,
colors she didn't know existed,
colors that were there the whole time, but she didn't see
a God, a friend that was there the whole time.

now,
admiring the beauty of a once unsure, and continuously unsure life
with a deeper knowledge of God's grace,
smiling, in her blue boots