I soil the un-rippled surface as I break through it. I feel the cold water touching every inch of my numb body. As the water envelopes me, I sink. Without a care I motionlessly fall. Staring at the once close surface of the water, now slowly getting farther from my reach. Every second that passes a twinge of pain slices in my chest. A feeling of regret. Every second that I sink down into this oceans deep, dark, un explored grounds I get farther away from the chance of changing my mind. But I am sure of myself. At least I was when I jumped. My eyes scan the last of the light that I see coming from the surface of this endless water. My lungs begin to scream for air. My body is tempted to thrash around and panic, but in my mind I am as calm as ever. Still, slowly sinking. Little bubbles begin to escape my mouth without my condolence. I watch as some of the little bubbles make their way up to the surface, dancing a sick dance of victory. I being too slowly fade in and out of my thoughts. More bubble escape. I become more aware ofΒ Β the cold water that surround me. Caressing my bare skin, calming me. Holding me. Doing what no one ever did. In my last seconds of life I look around in the dark water unable to make out what I see and I silently say my goodbyes to the only thing in my company, the vast ocean.